Making Valentine’s Day An Everyday Relationship

Valentine’s day has been around since the early church and Roman times! Father Valentine was sentenced to death for continuing to marry young couples when the Roman Emperor had put a ban on marriage in order to grow his army of young single soldiers. On his dying day he sent a message to the Emperor’s daughter and signed it ‘from Valentine”.

From such a classic story, we are now overwhelmed with a multi-billion dollar marketing   commercial annual event – So how can we celebrate our love relationships in a meaningful way?

If we share acts of kindness with our significant-other every day we really will have something to celebrate on Valentine’s day! You might be thinking “how could I do it every day?”. Different people express their love in different ways – understanding eachothers’ love language is key to building and sustaining a loving relationship. In the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, five distinct expressions of love are shared:

Are you and your partner speaking the same language? She gives you a hug, when what you want is a cooked meal, he brings you flowers, when what you want is a back massage! The problem is not that you have fallen out of love, it’s your love language!

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION:- Whether we notice how our spouse dresses or acknowledge the work they have done can be a display of love.  A ‘thank you” for providing a superb lunch for the in-laws; can turn a souring relationship around in a whisper! A phone call during the day to check how an important meeting went – all convey one thing “you are special to me and I LOVE YOU!

ACTS OF SERVICE:- Getting home in time to bath the children, so she can relax for 30 minutes; bringing him a cup of coffee in the morning; loading the dishwasher after supper rather than going straight to the TV or computer – each act of service is an act of love!

GIFTS:- A surprise gift for the one you love – it does not always have to have a large price tag attached, rather that it can be of significance – something you know she/he will really appreciate.

QUALITY TIME:- Imagine a meal with no technology or children interrupting? Create a date at home, or even better a date night out, just the two of you. Try doing this on a weekly basis and see how your relationship changes!

PHYSICAL TOUCH:- It’s easy for intimacy to get lost in the business of life! Holding hands as you walk around the shops or even watch TV. A kiss on the cheek to say thank you for a family supper.  If physical touch is your language, your partner’s gentle loving touch will melt the stress of a long day away!

If you want to reignite your significant relationship, you could  read The 5 Love Languages book together, or share a meaningful conversation around what you would really like the other to do as an expression of love.

If you are feeling stuck, then book a coaching package  and re-discover the love you both desire.

About parentcoachsa

Steph has over 30 year's experience working with families to design child care solutions and supporting parents to be the best parents they can be. In addition she has worked with corporates to find work-life balance solutions for their staff. As a practitioner I have become increasingly aware that work-life balance has become a critical issue, particularly in an age in which the demands of work are often at odds with home and family life. I am passionate about family life, it is the catalyst for every other relationship we have - in every other area of life, we expect to study, get a qualification, try something on appro , we want to feel in control - however it is the one area of life, that none of the above applies - Babies do not arrive with a parenting manual! It is my privilege as a Parent and Life Coach, to partner with you as you take hold of the challenges you are facing in your family, in your life and work with you , supporting you to achieve the decisions and outcomes you are choosing for your family and for your life. It is my job, to keep you on track, to cheer you on, when the "going gets tough". Through coaching, understanding of yourself and your child, and his or her phase of development will enable you to consciously develop a parenting style that will benefit you and your family.
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